


Five Feet Apart.

by mothhair



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, CF, Chronic Illness, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Character Death, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Remus is tired, So does James, he needs a fucking hug, idek if there can be a happy ending but i'll try, implied jegulus, james and sirius are besties, no magic, plz let this boy sleep, poor reggie :(, remus and lily are besties, remus likes to draw, same with sirius, some real sad shit tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 03:06:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29628141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mothhair/pseuds/mothhair
Summary: Remus Lupin knew his death was inevitable.  He knew he was going to die before most people did and he didn't mind it. He welcomed death with open arms until he met the black haired boy with band shirts down the hall. Suddenly he had a real reason to keep fighting.(Based on the movie five feet apart. duh.)
Relationships: Regulus Black/James Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 10
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

Sirius Black was a fighter. Always has been and always will be until his last breath. Partly because he had to be, and partly because he simply did not want to die so young. When Sirius was 3, he was officially diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis. Since then his whole life has been filled with extended hospital stays, surgeries, medication and a long list of other problems and bumps in the road. Always on a steady flow of oxygen, lugging that ugly tank around everywhere he goes. It wasn’t always terrible though. He had his best friend James, who also had CF. They met each other in the hospital when they were no more than six years old and have been by each other's side since then. Figuratively speaking of course. People with Cystic Fibrosis can’t get within 6 feet of each other. The risk of catching the other person’s bacteria was too much of a risk so 6 feet apart they stayed. It was nice having James around. They almost always had ‘tune ups’ at the same time which meant they were just a few doors down from each other when in the hospital, which is where Sirius found himself now. Any little cold or fever was a one way ticket to the hospital for a few weeks to be monitored and put on more meds.

Sirius finished unpacking all of his things and putting his posters on the wall when nurse Minerva wheeled in his med cart. “Okay honey, here you go. All set up.” She said with a smile and looked at the posters and drawings Sirius had hung up. 

“Thanks Minnie.” He said, pinning up one last drawing and taking a step back to admire his finally decorated wall. Minnie ran her fingers over the drawing Sirius had just hung up and nodded in approval. 

“I think this is his best one yet.” She said before walking back over to the med cart to double check and make sure everything was in order. “Okay, med sheet is on here, a fresh pack of gloves, Alice will be here in a while to check your vitals and James was checked in last night. Room 405. He’s taking a nap now so please leave him be until he wakes up. Okay?” 

“You got it Minnie.” Sirius smiled before putting on his little bag with an oxygen tank over his shoulder, hooking the cannula around his ears and under his nose. She smiled and nodded before walking out to check on the other patients, even though she would never admit it, Sirius was her favorite. Always has been and always will be. Sirius coughed into his elbow a few times before putting his mask on and walking out the door. James taking a nap was nothing more than inconvenient to Sirius, he was going to see him anyways. As he walked down the hall to go find his partner in crime he saw another boy 2 doors down setting a few bags on a bed. Sirius stopped and watched as Doctor Longbottom talked to the boy and an older lady in the room about god knows what before heading back off on his mission to annoy James. 

Remus put his last bag on his bed with a sigh. The doctor was talking to his grandpa about his new treatment and how it may or may not work. All the same bullshit he’s heard a million times before just re worded differently. “Okay sweetie, I have to go but i’ll be back in a few days to check on you okay?” His grandma smiled, giving him a kiss on the cheek. Remus just smiled and nodded, leaning down to give her a hug before she left. Doctor Longbottom watched her go before smiling at Remus.   
“Okay kid, you know the rules. Mask on in the hallway, 6 feet away from the other patients, gloves and everything else okay? We’ll start the new treatment tomorrow morning. I’ll have someone bring your med cart in later once you’re more settled in.” He said before leaving. Remus just laid down on his bed with a sigh and waited until the door was closed before pulling out his book and reading.

Sirius pounded on James’ door until he heard a groan and shuffling from inside. He smiled and took a few steps back as the door opened. “No napping asshole. Lets go get some ice cream.” James just smiled at his best friend and nodded, pulling his mask on over the tubing from his nose and grabbing his oxygen bag. 

“I didn’t think you were coming until tomorrow.” The shorter boy said as they started walking down the hall. 

“I was supposed to but Mommy Dearest said I was coughing up too much gunk so she sent me in this morning.” Sirius said with a shrug, walking past the new boys room again but frowning at the closed door. “You know who that is?” He asked curiously as they turned the corner to go to the stairs. James just shrugged and coughed into his elbow a few times. 

“Not really. I asked Minnie earlier and she just said he’s part of a new trial or something. I wasn’t paying much attention. She brought me pudding so I was much more focused on that.” He laughed. “I know his name is Remus though. Minnie said he’s 16 and he’s gonna be here for a while I guess.”

Remus Lupin was simply waiting for the day he would die. When his lungs would finally give out and he would take that last gasp for air before it was lights out. He knew he would die much sooner than later but secretly wished it would just come sooner. He didn’t see a point in keeping up with his regime if there was no hope he would ever get better. There was no waiting on the donner list and waiting for a new pair of lungs. There was no hope any of these new meds would actually help magically cure him when they haven’t worked on anyone else before. The boy was simply waiting for the day his body finally had enough and gave up on him. The only real reason he kept up with everything was just for his Grandma. She loved him more than anything on earth and would move planets to make sure he was okay and happy. When Remus was diagnosed at 2 years old, his parents dropped him off at his Grandma’s house and just never came back. It didn’t bother him too much. He was too young to remember ever having them around and it probably wasn’t easy to have a sick kid. Plus, his Grandma loved him and raised him. She was the only family he ever really had and the only family he ever wanted. He put on a smile and kept up with his meds and appointments and surgeries just because he knew how crushed she would be when the inevitable finally came. When the doctors told them Remus was off the donor list she cried for a week straight and it broke his heart. He had to keep fighting. At least a little bit. If he died she would really have nobody left. Remus Lupin didn’t keep living for himself. He kept living for the person he loved and that was all that mattered to him.


	2. Chapter 2

Sirius sat on the ledge in his room, spooning pudding with all his pills mixed in as he looked out the window. London was the prettiest at night. All the lights from the buildings lighting up the streets and the lovers who walked hand and hand down the road without a single care in the world. He liked to watch and try and imagine a life like that. A life without hospital stays and without medication all day every day. He wanted nothing more than to have a normal life like the people he saw dancing in the street without a single care in the world. He wanted to meet a nice person and know he would be able to spend forever with them. Grow old and still be so in love it was sickening. This is how he liked to spend most nights. When James went to bed and the halls were quiet he could always just sit here and imagine a perfect little life. His eyes followed one couple walk down the street, laughing together and he smiled. The girl on the street looked up and pointed at, what Sirius assumed to be, some stars. The black haired boy followed her gaze up and found himself staring at a boy, sitting on the ledge of the rooftop of the hospital. He was all bundled up in a jacket and scar, legs dangling over the edge and staring off into the lights from the city. Sirius frowned and squinted. It was the new boy from down the hall that he saw earlier. The same boy James was talking about. Sirius hopped off from the windowsill, pulling on his boots, jacket, hat, cannula and finally his mask before sneaking out of his room and down the hall to the elevator. Once he finally reached the top floor he climbed the small set of stairs to the rooftop door. He slowly pushed it open and walked outside. The boy jumped a little and looked over with a confused look. Sirius just gave a small smile and hopped up on the ledge, making sure to keep at least 6 feet away. “Hey..Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you. I uh..just saw you sitting out here alone and I saw you move your stuff in today so I thought i’d say hi.” He said. The boy just nodded, flashing him a small smile before turning his head back to look at the city. Sirius waited a couple seconds for the boy to say something but he never did so he cleared his throat, trying to think of the right thing to say before deciding on something simple. “I’m Sirius. Sirius Black. I’m uh..i’m down the hall from you. Just a few doors down actually.” He said, playing with his thumbs, waiting for the boy to say something. Anything.

“I’m Remus Lupin.” The taller boy said quietly, not taking his gaze away from staring into the distance. Sirius smiled at the boy, not like he would see anyways. 

“It’s nice to meet you. Not to sound like a creep or anything but I heard Minnie say you were part of a new drug trial?” Sirius asked. It wasn’t really meant to sound like a question but it came out that way anyways. Remus just nodded a little before coughing into his elbow, trying to catch his breath. 

“Yeah um.. B-cepacia.. They’re putting me on this new drug to try and kill the bacteria. Or kill some of it anyways. I think.” He said quietly, finally looking over at the other boy. His hat and mask were covering most of his face but Remus could still see the piercing blue eyes he had that stuck out against the black curly hair peeking out from under the beanie he was wearing. Remus felt his cheeks start to heat up and looked back forward before the other boy could see. Even though he was wearing a mask, he just wanted to be on the safe side. 

“Oh yeah! I remember Minnie telling me about that trial a few months ago! She was telling me all about how Doctor Longbottom was working on it and stuff.” Sirius said with a small smile, shivering as a cold breeze came rushing by. Having CF kind of meant you were thinner than normal people. Most people with CF have pancreatic insufficiency, which basically boils down to not being able to eat most food like a normal person. It also explains why most of the people on their floor are walking around with G-tubes. But even with all his layers on, Sirius could see Remus was a lot thinner than he probably should be. Sure, he was pretty tall but Sirius was baffled at how he wasn’t freezing his ass off up here. “You doing anything tomorrow? My friend James is having his parents visit so maybe I can show you around the hospital or something.” Sirius said, carefully climbing off the ledge, grabbing his little oxygen bag in the process. Remus looked over at him and stared for a few seconds, trying to compose his train of thought before nodding. 

“Um..yeah..sure. Sounds good.” Remus said, looking down at the other boy who was very obviously smiling under his mask. 

“Okay cool! I’ll stop by your room tomorrow and we can go for a walk or something.” Sirius said before rushing back into the warmth of the hospital, not even waiting for Remus to maybe change his mind. Sirius was smiling the whole way back to his room. Before he climbed into bed he peeked out the window one last time, only to see Remus had finally gone inside. 

Remus quietly snuck back into his own room and sighed, pulling off all his layers and curling up on his bed. He couldn’t even stop the small smile from forming on his lips as he thought about what just happened on the roof. This whole day he thought he would have to spend weeks or months alone in this hospital with nothing to do and nobody to talk to. Doomed to just sit around and wallow in self pity. But no, he might have actually made a friend here. A person to hang out with while his Gran was at work or while his best friend Lily was at school. It felt nice to know he might not actually have to be totally alone while he was here. He just had to remember the rules he was taught practically since birth. Mask on in the hallways and 6 feet apart at all times. That doesn’t sound too hard.


	3. Chapter 3

Remus was woken up at the crack of dawn by nurse Alice coming in to take his vitals and draw some blood. Remus Lupin was not a morning person by any means. Another reason on the very long list as to why he hates hospitals. Waking up and having a nurse poke at you before the sun is even fully up is not a good way to start off a day. Alice hummed softly to herself as she took his blood and wrote some things down on his chart before starting to pack up. “Okay sweetie all done. Sirius told me he was going to show you around today! That’s nice you're making friends Remus.” She said with her usual cheery smile. “Just make sure you’re back here by dinner time okay? Doctor Longbottom wants to start your new treatment after you eat. The two of us will come by then and talk you through everything.” She explained. Remus just huffed and nodded, pulling the blankets back up over his head, hoping she would just leave and he could maybe get back to sleep before he was woken up again for breakfast and morning meds. Even when she left he couldn’t get back to sleep. His brain simply would not shut up long enough to actually fall back asleep. He has plans today. Plans with Sirius Black from down the hall. 

Sirius crawled out of bed, pulling on a hoodie and some comfy shoes. Sure, Sirius didn’t mind all his meds and treatments if it meant he might be able to get new lungs but that didn’t stop him from pushing his limits a little more than he should. Every morning when he woke up he would leave his cannula off for as long as he could. Not for any real reason besides just seeing how long he could go. His personal record was 30 minutes. However, that was also before he got sick a few weeks ago. This morning he could only handle 10 minutes before gasping for air, shoving the tubes under his nose and trying to take a few deep breaths, holding onto his bed so he wouldn’t fall over. Sirius wasn’t stupid. He knew his lungs were getting worse and worse each day and it was only a matter of time before he absolutely needed a new pair of lungs. Once he finally caught his breath he sighed and went over to his med cart, taking everything he needed for the morning and staring at his wall of drawings and pictures. Most of the pictures were with his cousin Andromeda. A few of all the Black cousins from when they were all much younger. Sirius smiled to himself before his eyes landed on the newest drawing from his wall. A black and white pencil drawing of a pair of lungs that blossomed into flowers and stars. His hand reached out and his fingertips gently grazed over the small signature in the bottom corner of the page. R.A.B. The black haired boy sighed before hearing a harsh knock on the door, whipping his head around as the door swung open. James smiled, leaning against the door frame. “Good morning loser. Thought I’d pop in and say hello before Mum and Dad show up. You know, I heard from a little bird you’re showing that new kid around today. And by that I mean I overheard Alice talking to him this morning.” Sirius chuckled and rolled his eyes, pulling his mask on before walking over to the door. 

“God you’re such a noisy little prick. But yes I am. Wanna go get some pudding before your parents get here?” 

“Of course!” James said, watching his friend set some of his meds down. He pushed his glasses up his nose and was turning to head out of the door before his eyes landed on the news drawing on Sirius’ wall. Sirius saw the way James’ smile faded, staring at the wall. The black haired boy frowned and headed out of the room before James could say anything about the drawing. The two boys walked down to the cafeteria together in silence. 

Remus leaned over his notepad, mindlessly doodling away when he heard a knock on his open door. He looked up and saw Sirius Black standing in the doorway and smiling. “Hey. You ready?” The shorter boy asked. Remus gave him a small smile back before nodding, closing his notepad and slipping his mask on. “What you working on?” Sirius asked, curiously craning his neck to try and get a glimpse at whatever Remus was focused on just minutes before. The sandy haired boy just shrugged, pulling his boots on.

“Nothing special. I just like to draw sometimes.” Remus explained, slinging his little oxygen bag over his shoulder. 

“You like to draw?” Sirius asked, looking around the rest of Remus’ room. The other boy didn’t have much in there besides some notepads and pencils over his desk and piles of books in random spots, like on top of his med cart. 

“Yeah I do sometimes. I think it’s just really calming.” Remus said, watching Sirius look around his room before the other boy said anything else. 

“Dude..your med cart is like...a mess. How do you keep track of everything?” Sirius asked and raised an eyebrow. Remus chucked and shrugged, looking at the messy cart himself. 

“I don’t.” He said simply and walked out of the door and headed off down the hall. Sirius frowned and quickly followed after him, making sure to keep his distance. 

“What do you mean you don’t? You don’t take your meds?” Sirius’ voice sounded a little more concerned than he would have liked it to but it apparently got the point across because Remus had stopped walking. 

“I mean...not really. I take whatever the nurses hand me but other than that..no?” The taller boy shrugged and sighed. “I just don’t see a point. I can’t get a transplant anyways so there really isn’t much of a point.” Sirius listened to him and just frowned. What does he mean there isn’t much of a point? It’s what’s keeping him alive, of course there was a point in it all.

“Okay okay okay no. I hate to break it to you kid but there is a point. Those meds are keeping you alive until they can find the right treatment for you! Plus, I'm a year older so I’m right by default. We’re gonna start doing our regimens together so I know you’re ACTUALLY doing what you’re supposed to. This new treatment won’t work at all if you’re not putting anything into it, and i’m not gonna have you croak while you’re here okay?” Sirius huffed and crossed his arm across his chest. Remus’ eyes were a little wide from shock and stayed quiet for a few seconds before nodding.

“Okay...okay fine.” Remus said with a long dramatic sigh. As they started walking back down the hall he looked over at Sirius with a confused look. “Wait a second, I never told you how old I was.” Sirius just smiled and shrugged. It took less convincing than he thought he would have to do. 

“Minnie told me.”


	4. Chapter 4

Remus Lupin has officially been at the hospital for 4 days. It has been 3 days since Sirius Black started making him take his regimen and treatment more seriously. The two boys would facetime each other and talk while taking their meds, treatments and even when they both had to wear aflovests to try and cough up all the shit building up in their lungs. It wasn’t exactly a pleasing sight to see each other cough up mucus in a bowl but it was funny to hear the other person laugh and try to talk with their whole upper body vibrating. Sirius Black found out Remus has a very nice laugh and the corners of his eyes crinkle when he smiles. Remus Lupin found out Sirius loves to make other people smile and laugh even if it was at his own expense. Even when the two weren’t doing treatments they were still almost always together, plus James. The three of them would go on walks through the hospital or just sit outside of their own rooms and talk across the hallway for hours. The three boys got along very well but today was the first day Remus wouldn’t be joining them in their usual activities to cause Minnie stress. Sirius saw his phone light up with a call from Remus and he broke out in a smile. 

“Hey loser. I was just about to call you! Want to come to the NICU with me and James? Minnie said there’s a new baby and she finally gave us permission to go alone if we promise to be quiet.” Sirius rushed out, already putting his shoes on. Remus flashed him a sad smile and shook his head. 

“Actually I can’t today. My friend Lily is coming to visit. I was calling to tell you I probably can’t hang out at all today. She’s staying till dinner and you know Doctor Longbottom doesn’t like me moving around too much after my treatment. I’m sorry..” Remus said sadly and sighed, biting his lip. “Buuut I’m free tomorrow. We can go look at babies all day tomorrow if you want.” Sirius just nodded and smiled, pushing some of his curly hair behind his ear. 

“Yeah sure mate! Sounds like a plan. Just don’t forget your meds or anything.” Sirius said, trying not to sound like a clingy girlfriend. He simply just wanted Remus to take better care of himself so he didn’t die down the hallway. That’s all. Plus, maybe the boy was really growing on him and just maybe he cared about him more than he would like to admit to. Remus just chuckled a little, coughing into his elbow as he nodded.

“Already took my morning meds. Plus, when Lily is around she makes me take them.” Remus said and shrugged, looking at the wall Sirius was sitting in front of. “Hey that’s really cool. That picture right there.” He said and pointed even though it wasn’t like Sirius could tell which picture he was pointing at. “That one! The one with the lungs and flowers. Did you draw that?” He asked with that bright Remus Lupin smile. Sirius knew what drawing he was talking about but turned his head to look at it anyways, frowning before he turned his head back.

“Um..n-no. My brother drew it.” Sirius said quietly and sighed. “Uh..I gotta go. I told James I would meet him upstairs. I’ll talk to you later.” He said bluntly before hanging up, not waiting for Remus to say anything else back. Remus frowned as his screen went black and put his phone down right as Lily walked in with a big smile. 

“Remus!” She squealed and ran over, hugging the boy tightly. He smiled and hugged her back just as tight. He loved Lily a lot. She was his best friend in the whole world and nobody knew Remus quite like Lily did. “Oh my god! I missed you so much. I’m so sorry it took me so long to come visit. School has been literal hell without you there.” She said and sat down on his bed, taking off the scarf Remus bought her for her 13th birthday. “Plus, Tunie has been just awful to me the past few months. How have you been? How’s your new treatment going? I talked to your Gran and she said you made some new friends here! That’s great Rem! I want to hear all about ‘em.” She rushed out all at once. Remus just smiled and pulled her into another tight hug. Remus has only been in the hospital for a few days but hasn’t seen Lily in a few weeks. Before he came in he had a pretty nasty cold, which meant no visitors. By the time he was better he was already packed and on his way to the hospital. 

“I missed you so much Lils. You have no bloody idea.” He sighed into her shoulder. The red haired girl just giggled and hugged him back. 

“I missed you too.” She said, pulling back and grabbing Remus’ face. “You lost more weight didn’t you? Rem I told you to tell the doctors to up whatever the hell they’re feeding you through that tube! You’re burning like twice the amount of calories they’re giving you.” She huffed. Remus just smiled and shrugged. Lily always had his best interest at heart. Making sure he took all his meds and was eating as much as he should, or at least getting enough nutrition though his G-tube. The truth was, the doctor did start giving him more G-tube goo but walking around the hospital with James and Sirius was probably making him lose the weight. It wasn’t his fault he was a 16 year old boy with the fastest metabolism in the world. 

The two of them just sat on his bed for the rest of the day catching each other up on their lives the past few weeks. Lily told him about school and the fights she had with Petunia. Remus told her all about Sirius and James and the things they would do throughout the day and the fact Sirius and him would do their meds and treatments together. Lily listened and ate her pudding as Remus went on and on about how funny Sirius was and how nice he was. “You know Remus, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say it sounds like you fancy this Sirius Black.” She giggled and nudged him with her foot. Remus frowned and stared at her before shaking his head. 

“Oh fuck off.” He mumbled and shoved her a little with her foot. She just giggled and rolled her eyes, poking his shoulder a few times to get the sour puss look off his face. 

“Well, what else do you know about him? Is he from London? Is he an only child? Does he have some weird obsession or anything fun like that?” She asked, leaning against his shoulder. Remus smiled and shrugged, wrapping his arm around her before shaking his head. 

“He’s from London. Very posh family from what I've gathered. No weird obsessions that I know of. I do know he has a brother. He’s only mentioned him once and that was earlier today but he got all weird and hung up right after. Maybe they don’t get along or something. Like you and Tunie.” Lily went quiet for a minute before grabbing her phone. “What are you doing?” Remus asked, watching as she typed in Sirius’ name. 

“Sirius Orion Black. His mother’s name is Walburga Black and his father is Orion Black.” She started before frowning. “Regulus Arcturus Black. A year and a half younger than Sirius but there isn’t much information on him..Wait a second! The Black family! I remember my dad telling me about them! They’re like really rich poshy people. Sirius’ dad used to come into my dad’s shop sometimes to buy flowers! Dad said they come from old money and stuff like that. Maybe they disowned Regulus or something. From what he told me they seem like the kind of people to do something like that.” Lily said and frowned, turning to look at Remus, handing him her phone. Remus frowned and stared at the picture on Lily’s screen of the family. Two young boys and their parents. If Sirius didn’t have a mask on it would have been nearly impossible to tell the two boys apart. Sirius was only slightly taller and his hair a bit longer. If what Lily said was true it wouldn’t be hard to believe. Sure, Remus didn’t get disowned but abandoned isn’t much better. 

“Sirius has a drawing from his brother in his room. I think all the drawings on his wall are from his brother but he never talks about him.” Remus mumbled, handing the phone back before laying back against the bed. Sirius wouldn’t have drawings from a brother who got disowned if it didn’t mean something to him. Maybe he just never talked about him because it was too sad to bring up. Either way, Remus could not stop thinking about the lost Black brother and what he possibly could have done to get disowned and not even visit his own brother in the hospital.


	5. Chapter 5

Remus woke up the next day with one thing on his mind and that was to find out the truth about what happened to Regulus Black. Sirius obviously loved him enough to bring his drawings to the hospital and hang them up on his wall. Of course it wasn’t really his place to ask or even know about but he was curious. Why Sirius and James never spoke about him. Why did Sirius get all weird when Remus asked about the drawing. The sandy haired boy’s thought were interrupted by a call from Mr. Sirius Black himself. Remus smiled down at his phone and answered the ringing FaceTime call. 

“Good morning tosser! Once you finish morning meds meet me down the hall. Another baby was brought into the NICU last night and I really wanna go see. James is still asleep but I wanna get up there before the nurses do lunch rounds.” Sirius spit out quickly while shoving med pudding in his face. Remus smiled and nodded, pulling his own shoes and cannula on. 

“Already took them. I’ll meet you there in a few minutes.” He said and hung up the phone. Remus grabbed a small notepad and a few pencils on his way out the door, slipping his mask on over his face. By the time he reached the end of the hall he was met with the piercing grey eyes and morning hair of Sirius Black.

“You ready? What’s with the drawing stuff?” The shorter boy asked as they set off on their small adventure upstairs. 

“Nothing. Just thought I'd try and get some drawing time in. Nobody really lets me draw them besides Lily so I think it’s the perfect time to get some practice in.” Remus smiled down at the boy as they slowly but surely climbed the stairs and hiked down the hallway. By the time they reached the door, both boys held onto the wall to try and catch their breath. It wasn’t easy walking the stairs every day but they couldn’t exactly take the elevator together. Plus, Minnie said exercise is good for you. Both boys walked into the small, quiet viewing room of the NICU. There was a small couch and a few chairs in the tiny area and the big glass wall they looked into where the babies were kept and tended to. It was quiet. Remus wondered why Sirius liked being in here so much considering how loud he was everywhere else. Remus pulled one chair up to the glass and plopped himself down before pulling out his notepad and pencils. He could hear Sirius doing the same a few feet away and Remus was mentally trying to work out how he could gently ask the question he desperately wanted to ask. Sirius looked through the glass and smiled before turning his attention back to his friend and watching him sketch the outline of one of the babies in the crib. The black haired boy watched as Remus started drawing out all the little details and thought to himself how talented his friend really was. Remus was very good at what he liked doing but never flaunted it off to anyone. 

“You draw like my brother. The same style I mean.” Sirius said quietly, not breaking his gaze from the paper in Remus’ lap. The other boy hesitated for a second before continuing to draw. 

“I’ll take that as a compliment. That picture in your room is really good.” Remus said quietly, looking back up to the small baby he decided to draw, making a mental note to leave out all the wires and tubes the tiny human was hooked up to. He had already decided to give his drawing to the nurse before they left to give to the parents. Sirius smiled a bit and nodded. “You never..you know..talk about him..” Remus said slowly, trying to pick his words wisely. He wasn’t exactly the most delicate person in the entire world but he was trying his best not to strike a nerve. 

“Yeah...I know. I just miss him. A lot..” Siris said quietly and turned his own gaze to the floor. He could feel the tears starting to form in his eyes, blinking them away before they had the chance to fall down his cheeks. Remus frowned, glancing over to his friend for a split second before looking back at the baby. 

“Did he move away?” Remus asked just as slow as he did before. He knew he shouldn’t be provoking the situation. Sirius’ family life was non of his fucking business. Where his brother was was also none of his fucking business but he couldn’t stop the question from spilling from his mouth. Sirius went quiet, biting his lip and shaking his head. It took him a bit longer to answer than he planned to, but getting the words out was a lot harder than he thought it would be. 

“N-No he um...He died. Almost a year ago actually.” Sirius said slowly, hearing his voice crack at the sentence is what finally made a few tears escape from his eyes and start rolling down his face. “He went on a family vacation with some of our cousins last year to a family house on the beach. I was stuck here so I couldn’t go. My mother didn’t want to risk me getting more sick or whatever. He was um...on the beach with our cousins Bella and Cissy. He was just so...small, you know? A big wave came in, sucked him under and Cissy said he hit his head on a rock or something and drowned..” He wiped some of the tears away from his face but they wouldn’t stop coming. “He was my bestfriend...Our parents aren’t exactly the nicest people so we were all each other had when we were growing up. When I started getting really sick he would sit by my bed and draw me pictures to try and make everything less scary. A few years went by and we met James. I have never seen Reggie so happy before and it was so nice to finally have another friend to talk to in the hospital. Those two...they were so in love it was crazy. I was so happy Reggie was happy. T-then he died and then it was just me and Jamie. He took the whole thing really bad. Probably just as bad as I did. They were so in love and it was just all taken away within a second. James lost the love of his life and I lost my little brother.” 

Remus frowned and looked over at his friend, who was desperately trying to hide his tears. He wished there was something he could do but there wasn’t. He couldn’t hug Sirius until he stopped crying. He just had to watch from what felt like miles away. “S-Sirius..I’m so sorry..” Was all he could manage. Remus felt a few tears start rolling down his own cheeks, quickly wiping them away. He couldn’t even imagine the pain Sirius had gone through. He lost his little brother and he knew there wasn’t really anything he could say that would make it better. So, the two boys just sat in silence as Sirius softly cried into his sleeve and Remus wished they weren’t sick so he could hug his friend, comfort him and tell him everything was all right.


	6. Chapter 6

Remus Lupin had finally learned about the tragic end of Regulus Black a few days ago. The entire moment of Sirius spilling the secret of his little brother still plays in his mind. The way his friends voice cracked and the way his whole body shook with sobs that Remus couldn’t comfort. The two boys sat in the NICU for hours in almost silence for hours. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence that made the boys anxious or uneasy. It was the kind of silence where you knew you didn’t have to say anything for the other person to know what you wanted to say. Sirius had never actually cried over his brother’s death before. When it happened, he was angry. Angry he wasn’t there to save him. Angry at his family for not doing more to stop what happened. Angry for the fact that Regulus was his little brother and it was supposed to be his job to care for him and make sure he was okay. Even when the two Black brothers were kids, Regulus always held Sirius’ hand for treatments and was always by his side before he went under for surgeries. Regulus was always there to take care of Sirius when it should have been the other way around. Then he was numb. If he didn’t think about what happened maybe it wasn’t real. Regulus was just at Bella and Cissy’s house for a prolonged vacation. If he didn’t think about it, it was easier to pretend the event just never happened. So, Sirius cried. Finally cried and truly mourned for the loss of his baby brother. He let out the years worth of pent up anger and sadness that had been slowly eating him alive for far too long. He cried his heart out and Remus didn’t do anything to make him feel embarrassed or ashamed of letting his emotions out. It was nice to have a friend by his side who didn’t judge him like his family did. Sirius grew up in a house where emotion was a sign of weakness. For once the small black haired boy felt it was okay to let his weakness show. He was in the company of a boy he hadn’t known for very long but a boy who he truly felt comfortable around. Sirius couldn’t talk to James about Regulus. Ever. He should be able to but the words could never leave either of their mouths. It was an unspoken rule between the two to never bring his name up. It just hurt too much. 

So, the two friends sat in a comfortable silence for hours on end as the day came to a close. The whole day was spent in the little room off the NICU, Remus drawing pictures of the two babies in their cribs and Sirius watching every stroke of the pencil, watching intently as the taller boy shaded in all the small details of the newborns. By the time they were leaving, Remus gently knocked on the glass to catch the nurses attention, handing over the papers and quietly asking her to give them to the parents of the infants. The two of them walked back downstairs together. Once they finally got back to their own hallway of the hospital Sirius flashed Remus a warm smile. “See you tomorrow?” He asked, voice still a bit scratchy from the events of upstairs. Remus smiled at him back and nodded. 

“See you tomorrow.” Remus said, and with that both boys went their separate ways to their own rooms for the night. Sirius fell asleep the moment his head hit the pillow, but Remus sat on his window ledge sheet and pulled out his notepad and went to work. Even if he couldn’t hug Sirius or get out the words he wanted to tell him he knew he could express himself in the one way he knew he was good at. 

The next few days went by just the same as they have before. The three boys walking around the hospital together, making jokes and giving Minnie a headache. Today however, was going to be very different. Even if two of the boys were still unaware. James woke up earlier than usual, going down to the cafeteria to get a shake before everyone else started with their morning when he caught sight of something he wished he didn’t. The boy left his shake and hurried back upstairs as fast as his failing lungs would allow. To avoid the path of the situation he had seen, he ran up the stairs two flights and ran down the hallway, banging on his best friends door while coughing and gasping for air. Minnie frowned and rushed over, trying to rub his back and get his breathing under control as Sirius opened the door with a frown. 

“Mr. Potter! I need you to try and relax before you pass out in my hallway.” Minnie sighed, patting his back to try and loosen any mucus blocking his airway. James just shook his head and tried to push her away with no avail. He took his glasses off and kept gasping to try and get out the words that were stuck in his throat. 

“M-mother! H-h-here! NOW!” James managed to get out before his eyes rolled back and collapsed on the floor. Remus opened his own door just to see one friend unconscious on the floor and the other one as white as a ghost. Minnie called the other nurses over to get James up on some heavy duty oxygen while Sirius bolted to the window in the hallway. 

“MR. BLACK! I certainly do not need two of you with a tube down your throat! You know the rules about you lot running around! Go to your room and sit down. Now!” Minnie snapped as they carried James into his own room. Remus frowned and watched from afar as Sirius shook his head. 

“My mother is here.” Was all he said before running back to his room. Remus frowned and walked over, standing outside of his friend's room to see him quickly taking all of his brother's drawings and pictures off the wall, shoving them in drawers and in his bag. 

“Mate..you alright?” Remus asked slowly. He had never seen Sirius so worked up like this. It was a bit scary to see him in this state. Sirius shook his head and kept taking everything off his wall, careful not to rip or damage anything. 

“My mother is here. She isn’t exactly a ray of sunshine. It’s just hard to explain.” Was the only answer he got before the taller boy heard the elevator ding and the sound of high heels making their way down the hall. 

“Minerva! Where is my son?” Said a lady with the most terrifying voice Remus had ever heard. He quickly stepped out of the doorway and quickly went back to his own room, peering out to see the woman whose voice made his blood run cold. Minnie walked out of James’ room with the fakest smile Remus had ever seen her give. 

“Hello to you too, Mrs. Black. I didn’t think you were coming to visit until next weekend. What a lovely surprise.” Minnie said. Remus frowned as he finally saw the women. You could tell she was Sirius’ mother, but at the same time it was very hard to believe. The woman standing at the nursing station desk had the same black, curly hair and blue eyes but it all seemed different. Her eyes were not the same shade of grey that Sirius had. Sirius’ eyes were like the sky after a summer storm. His mothers’ on the other hand felt cold and cruel. Like looking into them for too long would turn you to stone. She was tall and slender but in a way she looked like a spider. Remus had concluded that Sirius’ mother was simply a terrifying woman. The look she shot at Minnie made the hairs on his neck stand up and the look wasn’t even directed towards him. 

“Need I remind you he is MY son Minerva?” The woman snapped. Minnie seemed unfazed by her harsh tone. “I demand to see his treatment plan and speak to Doctor Longbottom.” 

“Walburga..Doctor Longbottom is a very busy man. I believe he is in surgery at the moment but I would be more than happy to go over Sirius’ treatment with you.” Minnie explained calmly, already reaching to grab his chart. Remus poked his head out a little further and saw Sirius walking out of his room, carrying his oxygen tank and coughing into his elbow with every fiber of his being. Sirius kept coughing and gasping for breath. The eldest Black brother made his way over to his mother and Remus noticed his hair looked more disheveled then it did a few minutes ago. Remus frowned and watches as his friend hobbled his way over to the desk and wondering what the fuck happened to Sirius within the span of a few minutes.

Sirius knew what he was doing. It was the same bit he’s been doing basically his whole life. While Minnie was talking to his mother he was doing jumping jacks in his room and holding his breath for longer than he should have. The harder he coughed the longer he got to stay at the hospital. The more he gasped for air the longer he got to be away from home. “Hi mother.” He said before being thrown into another coughing fit. Walburga scowled at her son and turned back to Minnie. 

“What exactly is he doing here if he isn’t getting better?! Do you people completely ignore my son on purpose?!” She snapped but Minnie just shrugged and walked around the desk to help Sirius back to his room as his mother followed behind them. 

“Walburga, your son is very sick. His lungs are working at about 35% right now and declining. I don’t know if you’ve forgotten but he has Cystic Fibrosis. He is sick.” Minnie sighed and helped slip an oxygen mask over Sirius' face as he sat on the bed.

“I did not ask for the sass Minerva.” She snapped, crossing her arms across her chest. Walburga glared down at her son in his hospital bed before shaking her head. “So what are we going to do to fix him then?”

“Well that’s something we were going to talk about when you came in next. Sirius needs a lung transplant sooner than later. He’s being pushed up the donor list but we are still waiting for some new lungs to come in.” Minnie explained and looked at her chart. “His treatments are working but they can only do so much. I’m afraid we are simply going to have to keep him here until he can get a transplant.” She said. Sirius knew the last part was bullshit. Yes, he needed new lungs. Yes, he was very sick but he wasn’t that sick. He also knew Minnie would always help him out with his little white lies. He loved Minnie a lot. Even as a kid, him and Reggie would talk about how they wished nurse Minerva was their mother instead of the cold shell of a person they got stuck with. 

“Well is there anything we can do to speed this along?” His mother asked impatiently, still glaring down at her son. 

“No. There isn’t. You know very well that isn’t how it works Walburga. I’m sorry but Sirius just has to stay here and take it easy until he gets the surgery.” Minnie shrugged. “So, if that is all I’m going to have to ask you to leave for today. Sirius needs his rest.” She said and with that, his mother simply huffed and spun on her heels before leaving. The two of them waited until they heard the faint ding of the elevator before Sirius pulled the oxygen mask off and got out of bed. 

“Thank you Minnie.” Sirius said with a smile, going to the mirror to straighten his hair out. She just smiled at him and shook her head with a small chuckle. 

“Of course honey. Just try not to jump around as much next time.” She chuckled and started to head out before Sirius stopped her.

“Is Jamie okay?” He asked with a frown. “He’s okay right?” 

“Mr. Potter is doing alright. He’s asleep right now. We had to intubate him to get some oxygen in, but he’ll be okay.” She said with a smile and left. 

Sirius Black hated his mother more than life itself. He was terrified to the very bone of that woman. Sometimes he couldn’t even imagine life if he wasn’t sick. If he didn’t have an excuse to leave for weeks at a time to get treatment. It was maybe one of the only perks of being sick. That and the fact that if he wasn’t sick he would have never met Remus Lupin and his ugly sweaters.


	7. Chapter 7

Remus was still trying to wrap his brain around the events that happened this morning. James being carried away to his room after passing out, seeing the most terrifying woman of his entire life and hearing the yelling from said woman all the way down the hall. He simply couldn’t understand it. How Sirius was related to such a woman. Sirius was nothing like her. He was sweett, funny, kind, compassionate, full of light and love. It just didn’t make any sense how such a wonderful person could come from a person like that woman. After lunch, Remus made his way down the hall and knocked on the open door of Sirius’ room. “Hey.” The taller boy said. Sirius looked over from where he was re-hanging the things on his wall and smiled back. 

“Hey! I’m almost done hanging everything back up. Once I’m done want to go upstairs and look at the babies? Minnie said James is gonna be out of commission for a few days and I just need some quiet after this morning.” Sirius said with a chuckle, turning back to hang the past few pictures and drawings up. Remus nodded and ran a hand through his sandy blonde hair, leaning against the door frame, watching his friend carefully pin things to his wall. 

“You alright? I mean... your mum seems pretty scary.” Remus said quietly. Sirius just chuckled and nodded. 

“Yeah I’m alright. You’re right though. She is a scary lady. But, Minnie helps me out a lot. We tell mother I’m a lot sicker than I am so I get to stay here longer.” Sirius shrugged, grabbing his oxygen bag and a book he never plans to read. “Ready?” He asked with a smile. Remus just returned the smile and nodded as they headed down the hall and upstairs.

Once the two were in the NICU they took their normal chairs and brought them up to the glass. Remus took out his notepad and pencils and just started drawing away. One of the babies from the other day went home, so there was a new baby all hooked up to all sorts of machines. Sirius plopped down in his chair and looked over to watch his friend scribble away. The good thing about the NICU was they had to be quiet. There wasn’t pressure to be funny or talk about anything in general. Neither of them minded though. Sirius sat silently for an hour as Remus drew before he said anything. “What are your parents like?” The eldest Black brother asked quietly. Remus never talked about his family. In all honesty Sirius didn’t know much about his friend besides the fact he also had CF, he liked to read and draw and he couldn’t get a transplant because he had a nasty form of bacteria. Other than that, the boy he spent all day with was a total mystery.

Remus didn’t flinch or pause for even a moment. He just shrugged and pushed some hair out of his face before going back to his art. “I don’t have parents.” He said simply. Sirius frowned and stared at his friend for a few moments. 

“What? You don’t have parents?” He asked. It came out a lot harsher than he intended it to but he couldn’t help it. Remus Lupin didn’t have parents? His new best friend, the boy he spent every day with didn’t have parents?

“Well, I mean I guess I do. They’re somewhere but when I got sick they dropped me off at my Gran’s house and turned back. I lived with them until I was 2, got diagnosed and then I just never saw them again.” Sirius frowned at his friend as his eyes scanned all over his face. Looking for a frown or anything that would indicate some sort of emotion but he never found one. 

“God..I’m sorry Rem..” Was all he said. Remus shrugged again and looked over at his friend. Remus just stared at his friend for a second before going into his pocket. The taller boy pulled out his wallet and took a picture out before tossing it over to Sirius. Sirius frowned and caught the picture, looking down at the old photo in his hands. It was a picture of what he assumed was Remus and his parents. A very pretty young lady with the same crooked smile and sandy blonde hair as his friend standing next to a tall man with Remus’ wavy hair and a big bright smile. The woman was holding a baby that couldn’t have been more than 2 years old. The baby was very obviously mid giggle, hugging his mother tightly. They looked so happy. Sirius couldn’t understand any of it. The family looked genuinely happy together. He could practically feel the love just from looking at the picture. Sirius simply couldn’t understand how a family that looked this happy could just leave their child and never come back. Remus could sense all the questions Sirius wanted to ask but couldn’t find the words to ask in a polite way. 

“We were really poor. Like very very poor. They couldn’t afford my hospital bills or surgeries. Neither of them had insurance or anything. My gran has insurance through the government so they knew she could take care of me. I just don’t know why they never came back. They could have let me live there and visit but they never did.” Remus mumbled, head still down and focused on his drawing. He always tried to say it didn’t bother him. Nobody wants a sick child they can’t afford to take care of. But he didn’t know why they never came back. Never wrote or called or anything. Sirius felt sick. He never had to think about parents not being able to afford to keep their child alive. It was just never something him or anyone he knew had to deal with. His family was wealthy and so are James’. Sirius’ family might be some of the crulest people to walk the earth but he never had to worry about not being able to afford to live. On one hand he could understand why Remus’ parents did what they did. They wanted their son to have a fighting chance but what he couldn’t understand was how someone could just abandon their kid. 

“I’m sorry mate..” Sirius said quietly and frowned at his friend. “They missed out on a really cool kid. Their loss anyways.” Remus frowned and stopped drawing. He didn’t look up. Not to look at the babies on the other side of the glass or even to look at Sirius. He just paused and stayed quiet. For a moment Sirius was starting to panic, thinking he crossed a line he shouldn’t have. He could feel the anxiety building up before he heard a choked sob escape his friends lips. Remus dropped his pencil and brought his hands up to his face and sobbed into his hands, tears splashing on his drawing and smudging the meticulous pencil strokes. It wasn’t anything Remus hadn’t heard before. His Gran would always tell him they missed out on a good kid but hearing it come from Sirius was different. It wasn’t coming from a family member or someone who was forced to love him. For the first time in his life Remus knew that statement actually meant something. It was coming from someone who wasn’t legally obligated to care about him and say things to make him feel better. He knew Sirius meant what he said and that’s what hit him the hardest. Sirius frowned and stood up quickly before stopping. He wanted to hug Remus more than anything in the world. He wanted to wrap his arms around him and just let him cry and get it all out of his system but he couldn’t. He didn’t even know what to do. There was nothing he could say to magically make his friend feel better or do anything to comfort him. But there wasn’t anything he could do. Sirius sat back down in his chair and let his friend cry, wiping away the few stray tears he felt rolling down his own cheeks. 

After a while Remus had calmed down, wiping his cheeks with the sleeve of his sweater and laughing quietly. “Sorry..” He mumbled softly and Sirius just shook his head. 

“Don’t be sorry mate. If anything just think of it as payback. You watched me cry and I watched you cry. Now we’re even.” Sirius joked, causing Remus to look over at him with that famous Remus Lupin crooked smile. “C’mon, let’s get out of here. We can go for a walk or something. If you’re up to it I have something really fun we can do.” He said and stood up. Remus nodded and got up, grabbing his things and following Sirius out of the room and down the hall. In all honesty, he felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulder and it felt amazing. Even though he just cried his eyes out he was happy. Genuinely happy for the first time in a long time. As the two of them walked down the hall Remus just looked at Sirius and the way his hair curled up more at the ends. How the bright hospital lights bounced off his blue eyes that were very much so more grey than blue. He watched as Sirius talked about god only knows what and watched the little smile lines by his mouth when he laughed. Remus was happy. Even more happy to be where he was with Sirius. He didn’t want to be with anyone else in the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very aware that health care in the UK is not like this at all but I'm from New England so I wrote what I know im so sorry lmao


	8. Chapter 8

As the two boys walked around the hallways of the hospital Sirius kept catching Remus looking at him. Even when he had nothing to say he would glance over and the taller boy would quickly look away. Sirius could feel a blush creep up on his cheeks, pretending not to notice. He liked Remus. He liked him a lot in fact. He liked the way he laughed and the way he would get lost in his own little world when drawing. He liked making Remus laugh just to see him smile and the way his nose would scrunch up when he laughed really hard. This illness was a prison. He wanted nothing more than to hold the other boy’s hand as they walked around or just sit next to him in the NICU. The two of them have stayed a whole 6 feet apart since the day they met. Never any closer but never any farther when together. It was a risk to be closer than 6 feet around anyone with Cystic Fibrosis but Remus was different. There was a bigger risk than if he was just around James. If he caught Remus’ B-cepacia he could kiss new lungs goodbye. No transplant ever. It wasn’t fair in the slightest. All he wanted was to be a little bit closer. Just a little bit. Sirius frowned and stopped walking. Remus frowned and turned his head, giving him a questioning look. “You okay?” 

“I am so sick of being sick.” Sirius frowned and huffed. “This fucking illness has taken so much from me. From both of us! It has taken over my life and it will until the day I die and frankly, I’m over it.” He declared, throwing his arms in the air in frustration. Remus chuckled and shook his head, crossing his arms and shrugging. 

“Sirius, just because you say it doesn't make you any less sick. It doesn’t change anything no matter how shitty it is.”

“Well, I’m going to take something back.” Sirius said and looked at Remus. “One foot. I’m taking back one foot. Five feet apart.” Remus frowned and stared at the boy in front of him. He couldn’t be serious. 

“You know if you catch what I have you won’t get new lungs right?” Remus asked slowly. Maybe Sirius just forgot he had an incurable bacteria. Just maybe. 

“I know. I don’t care. I’m going to die anyways. Five feet?” Sirius asked, staring at his friend for his answer. Remus stayed quiet for a moment before nodding, a smile slowly spreading across his face. 

“Five feet.” Remus said quietly. Sirius smiled and took a deep breath before taking one step closer. One more foot. He was only one foot closer but it felt like miles. One foot closer to his friend. One foot closer to the boy with a crooked smile and the wavy dirty blonde hair and it felt so amazing. The two boys smiled at each other for a few moments before heading off down the hall. Sirius led the way on their little expedition and walked through the big double doors at the end of the hall. Remus followed behind and was hit with the smell of chlorine.

“They only really use the pool for old people or something. It’s almost always empty. Me, James and Reggie used to sneak down here when we were little but one time James fell in so he refused to come back.” Sirius chuckled, rolling up the bottoms of his pants and sitting at the edge, putting his feet in the water. Remus did the same and slowly sank his legs in the water, looking over at Sirius with a chuckle. 

“You know all the little nooks and crannies of this place, don’t you?” He asked, making Sirius laugh and nod. 

“I’ve been coming here since I could walk! Of course I do.” He laughed, splashing a few drops of water on Remus. “So tell me Mr. Lupin, how’s your drug trial going? You never talk about it.” Sirius said, leaning back on his elbows. Remus shrugged, swinging his legs back and forth in the water. 

“I don't know. I don’t think it’s working. Every time I do my treatment everyone's a little too quiet so I don’t think that’s good news.” Remus sighed, running a hand through his hair. 

“I’m sorry mate. I’m sure they’ll figure something out though. Doctor Longbottom always does. Maybe they’ll start you on a new drug!” Sirius said hopefully. Remus just smiled and shook his head.

“I’m not too worried about it. It’s only life. It’ll be over before you know it Mr. Black.” He said with a chuckle. Sirius smiled and rolled his eyes. 

“That may be true but don’t you wanna live a little Debby Downer? Just because we’re sick doesn’t mean we can’t live! Have a girlfriend? Fall in love and have someone that makes life worth living? Isn’t that the point to keep pushing on? Have you ever even HAD a girlfriend?” Sirius chuckled. Remus made a face and shook his head. 

“You might be right but to answer your question. No. Girls aren’t really...my type.” Remus laughed, shaking his head. “Plus, people don’t look at me like that. I don’t think anyone would ever want to see me with my shirt off anyways. All the surgery scars, the G-Tube. Nothing about any of it is beautiful.” Remus shrugged. Sirius frowned and looked over to his friend. How could Remus say such a thing? Did he truly think nothing about him was good enough for someone to actually love? It simply wasn’t true. 

“Everything about you is beautiful.” Sirius said simply before he could even register what he had said. It was true though. Every word of it was true. Everything about Remus was beautiful. The way his eyes crinkled and his nose scrunched when he laughed. The way his hair would form a few perfect little ringlets amongst the crazy waves. The hazel color of his eyes and the way they were more green when the sunlight hit them. Everything about Remus was beautiful. 

Remus looked over at Sirius with a certain look. It wasn’t mad or confused. It was just a look that screamed, ‘Really?’. They stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity before Remus pulled his legs out of the water and stood up. He took the cannula off his face and tossed it to the side before tugging off his big green grandpa sweater. His fingers hooked under the hem of the white shirt he had on and lingered for a moment before taking a deep breath and yanking it off over his head. Sirius frowned as his eyes scanned over his friend's body, taking in all the deep purple scars. A few on his stomach and the big ones on his chest. The scars weren’t what he was most interested in though. It was the way Remus’ ribs and collarbones poked out from under his skin and how his arms were probably half the size they should be. A mostly liquid diet was normal for people with CF. Most of them were too thin anyways. Sirius quickly stood up and pulled his own shirt off. The two boys had almost the same scars in the same places from similar surgeries but as Remus looked at Sirius’ arms and chest he noticed a few were much different from his own. Tiny circled burn marks and what looked like old belt lashes on his shoulders. Sirius was most definitely not joking when he said his parents were not nice people. The two of them stood in silence, just smiling at each other before Sirius smirked and let his body fall over and into the water with a splash. Remus laughed and jumped in after him. Both boys just laughing and splashing at each other, going under and opening their eyes to see the other under the water. 

As the two of them splashed around and tried to see who could do a flip under water the same thought played on repeat in Remus’ head. Sirius thought he was beautiful. Honestly and truly beautiful and he caught himself thinking the same thing. He thought Sirius was the most beautiful person he has ever met.


End file.
